Day Two: Something You Love About Yourself
October 13, 2010
This was an extremely difficult task: to come up with something I love about myself and write an entire blog post around it.
The truth is, I love a lot of things about myself. I don’t say that nonchalantly either; it took a long time to get to this point in my life.
I could tell you I love my ability to keep a secret. I could talk to you about my sense of humour or relatedly, my ability to laugh at myself. How I love that I can out-fart the dog, out-wit the husband and out-last the kids in a foot race. I could go on about how I’ve thrown myself back into school and how I’m finally working toward one of my most important lifelong goals. My eyes, my lips, my hips, my toes…I love it all. (What a conceited bitch, I know!) I’m happy though; truly, unabashedly happy with who I am.
There’s one thing though, that hit me in the head this afternoon, and I had to sit down and write about it:
I am a DAMN GOOD mother.
You know what? We mothers don’t get to brag about that one too often. Granny tells me I’m doing an amazing job. My cousins come to me looking for advice on parenting. My friends laugh when they see my kids and I interacting. My husband tears up a little when he tells me that he couldn’t have asked for a better mother to our boys.
Sure I feed them and clothe them and make sure their favorite pudding is in their lunches. I fill out forms, hand over money, drive them everywhere, tie their skates, coach their teams, and all of that; often with my own schoolwork in hand.
But that isn’t what makes me a good mother.
It isn’t the nagging to put their socks in the laundry, nor is it the rules and chores and schedules I set for them. That’s the easy stuff. I could do all of the tasks related to parenting while standing on my head.
Every day, physically & emotionally, I’m the moment with them. There’s no Twitter, Facebook, cell phone or television on when I listen to their issues with school, friends, and wardrobe malfunctions (yes, really). We talk about drugs, sex, music, lyrics especially, girls, boys, race, lesbians, straight and gay marriage (both are legal here), life and everything in between. No subject is taboo in this house. They know they can tell me anything and I am really proud of that.
I challenge them to do better, every day. When one comes home after a fight with a friend, we talk it out and try to figure out how he could fix it tomorrow. When I hear the oldest drumming his heart out while his friend kills it on electric guitar, I encourage the noise because one day the house will be too quiet. I let them work with tools, creating things I would never think of. I challenge the oldest to take on a few “Dad chores” and he relishes in the attention and newfound responsibility. I’m raising men. Maybe one day they will be husbands. Even if they aren’t husbands, they will need to learn life skills.
They say you aren’t supposed to be friends with your kids, and mine are only 6 and nearly 12. I know they need structure and discipline and they certainly get their fair share of that too. It’s just that I’d like to think that what I’m building here is a friendship that will carry them through the turmoil of the teenage years and on to adulthood. I treat them with great respect, extreme openness, a lot of understanding and more love than I can even describe. No, I don’t confide in them like they are my best girlfriends, but I think it’s okay to be friends with my boys as we navigate their little lives together.
I am a DAMN GOOD mother.
October 13th, 2010 at 3:36 am
I love your post. I know what you mean about it taking a long time to get to a point where you love things about yourself. I admire your owning your positive traits the way you did.
Laura Lohr | My Beautiful Life´s last words of wisdom ..Wordless Wednesday 30
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October 13th, 2010 at 9:42 am
When I was a kid, my Mom was my pal. She, like you, was a great Mom – and we were buddies.
Now I’m 65 and she’s 84. Now I take care of her like she once took care of me.
That said, she STILL treats me like I’m 12 (sometimes), and I have to say, there are times when it really pisses me off.
On the other hand, I guess I wouldn’t have it any other way.
lceel´s last words of wisdom ..Slightly Wordy Wednesday
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October 13th, 2010 at 1:10 pm
I think you are absolutely an amazing mother. Your boys are very lucky! My son and I are not each other’s confidant either, which is as it should be, but we have very open lines of communication even now. He knows he can come to me with any question or problem and I will be honest with him.
Lisa´s last words of wisdom ..This Old Dog
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October 13th, 2010 at 1:18 pm
I love this about you, too.
Suebob´s last words of wisdom ..Animals Dont Have Feelings
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October 13th, 2010 at 1:39 pm
it makes me so happy that you see all of those wonderful things about yourself. and i love that you can write confidently about being all of these wonderful things…especially being a good mom. yay, you!
hello haha narf´s last words of wisdom ..39 Today
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October 13th, 2010 at 6:11 pm
I’m smiling at this. I almost said this for mine. Almost. I sometimes think being a mother is the only thing I’m truly good at.
Issa´s last words of wisdom ..Day 2- Something you love about yourself
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October 13th, 2010 at 6:24 pm
Yay you! You are a damn good mother. That is self-evident.
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October 13th, 2010 at 9:54 pm
I think that my favourite part of all this was “I love a lot of things about myself”. That’s a dreamy sentence.
But you know, I agree, as much as I can, being over here, with all of the rest, too.
Zoeyjane´s last words of wisdom ..Day 13 – Medley
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October 15th, 2010 at 4:20 am
Yes. Yes you are.
And so am I.
We are awesome.
x
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October 15th, 2010 at 11:13 am
The world would be a better place if there were more mothers like you in it!
punkinmama´s last words of wisdom ..sugar overload
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October 18th, 2010 at 8:11 pm
Good for you! There is nothing more annoying to a kid than a mother who doesn’t think she’s competent. I had me one of those and she’s still driving me nuts.
Karen´s last words of wisdom ..30 Days of Truth
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